Moving Forward Towards Hope

The beginning of a new year is a time where people always reflect back on how their last year went and look forward to the year that’s coming. We constantly hear about people setting new goals, making “New Year’s resolutions,” even as far as having a “word of the year.” It’s a fresh start, a new season.

For those who are grieving, the new year is a reminder that we are moving into a new calendar year which our loved one won’t ever see.

The past year has been utterly gut-wrenching. We suffered through all of the “firsts” without Ellie.

 The first time her birthday rolled around.

The first Thanksgiving and the first Christmas without her.

The first anniversary of the day she went to be with Jesus.

The first year after loss can feel like you are walking on a landmine. That at any given moment, you will step on one that will go off without any rhyme or reason, and blow life up in your face.

That is still true for us today. But the distance between the landmines detonating feels greater.

Last year, we didn’t have any hope for our future.

We didn’t think we would ever feel whole again.

We didn’t know how it was possible to be able to enjoy our kids again, without the constant reminder that she should be here, right in the middle of them.

We didn’t know how we would feel any sense of joy again.

 Sometimes, we can get so stuck in our pain that we forget God’s promise to us.

God won’t always intervene to prevent, but He will always intervene to produce.

It can be dangerous getting stuck on the logical reasons behind why loss happens.

But we aren’t here to always get logical answers.

Hardship, grief, loss, painful seasons, always cause something to be produced inside of you.

This new year, that is what I am leaning into. Intently listening to what God is saying. Being obedient when I feel a nudge in my heart.

Learning how to loosen the grip I have on the pain that grief has brought and look forward towards the hope that is coming.

When walking through seasons of hardship, pain, and suffering, God is always trying to draw out something greater than the devastation you initially feel.

But we have to remember that we a role to play in that. We must remain obedient. We must remain faithful in our prayer life. We must continue raising our hands in worship, especially on the days where we don’t want to.

Lamentations 3:25 tells us, “The Lord is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him.”

When we place our hope in Jesus, he promises us that he will deliver.

That means we have to intentionally quiet the noise of this world.

We have to bring our mess to the feet of Jesus and surrender ourselves over to his will.

We can’t ask God to heal us while still gripping onto what is killing us.

We must show up authentically.

God can’t meet us in a place we pretend to be.

We must come to him in complete humility, admitting that his way is better than our way.

God is building us in the fire.

Running after hope and joy is a choice.

That’s the only goal I have for 2024. To intentionally chase the joy that is available through Jesus.

Even though loss alters our life here on earth, it makes heaven that much sweeter.